A breakup over cheating is hard enough to face publicly, but celebs going through one are forced to deal with nasty rumors on top of it. Not even a week has passed since singer-songwriters Moira Dela Torre and Jason Marvin Hernandez confirmed their split when posts speculating on what really caused it—apart from Hernandez’s infidelity—started circulating.
It makes us wonder: Why do some people feel the need to find fault in both parties? Why do women celebs continue to get vilified for either speaking out or keeping quiet about the personal struggles they go through?
Dela Torre tearfully admitted that she initially blamed herself for the breakup during her guest appearance in “Magandang Buhay” on June 6. After opening up about how hard it’s been to try to simultaneously grieve and heal, she said, “I guess sa lahat naman ng pinagdadaanan ko sa buhay, palaging ’yun ’yung initial reaction ko. I always say, ‘What did I do wrong?’ So especially now, ‘Saan ba ako nagkulang?’”
The split was announced on May 31 through a post where Hernandez also confessed that he was unfaithful to Dela Torre during their three-year marriage. A day after, internet personality Xian Gaza posted a photo of Hernandez and the former couple’s handler, Mac Merla, together. It drew speculations from netizens about the nature of their relationship, which prompted Merla to plead on June 2, “Pakiusap ko lang sana sa inyo bilang malapit nilang kaibigan na sana umiwas na tayo sa mga speculations na hindi nakakatulong sa napakahirap na sitwasyon na pinagdaraanan ni Moi and Jason.”
It’s wildly inappropriate how people started making jokes about Dela Torre writing a song about him being gay almost immediately, as if straight men can’t cheat. When will people stop making assumptions about someone’s sexuality to either justify or further demonize someone who’s guilty of cheating? It’s an invasive response that does nothing but shame and generalize queer folk.
Dela Torre faced even more pressure to speak out after that transpired. She first broke her silence on June 3 to dismiss other circulating allegations, one of which was how she cheated on her husband first.
“In spite of the pain I’m experiencing, let me set the record straight. While our marriage was not perfect, I have stayed true to my vows and I have never cheated on Jason,” she wrote. “Though we’re no longer together, it still hurts to see fabricated stories being told about us—most of which are so far from the truth.” It’s misogynistic how the rumor mill made up a story about Delta Torre based off nothing except her ex’s admission, accusing her of the very act that hurt her.
Celebs are people, too. Their pain shouldn’t be turned into spectacles.