Growing up, I had a challenging time making friends. Mainly because I was very shy and found it difficult to interact with people. Halfway through grade school, I finally had a group friends that I got along with really well. We’d have lunch together and go out to watch movies. When high school came around, we slowly started grow apart. During that time I started to branch out and try to meet other people outside that circle. I did, and throughout high school I had two wonderful best friends. Yes, I did have these best friends but they also had their own barkadas. Looking back, I don’t think I was ever really part of a core group of friends. The ones you go out of town with or the ones you have sleepovers with.
When I started college, I remember being anxious because, like I said, I have a difficult time interacting with people. True enough, in my first two years of college, I didn’t do a good job of making new friends. When I would hang out with people they would be people that I know from high school. There’s nothing wrong with that but I always felt like I didn’t belong anywhere. There are, however, a handful of people from my college life that I love dearly and are still in my life today.
Before my third year of college, we had a long summer break so I signed up for an internship program to pass the time. During these months, I felt a little lost. I had just gotten out of a relationship and I wasn’t doing well in school. It was around this time that I picked up DJing, which turned everything around. I fell in love with it and music in general. In the hopes of making an effort, I decided to put myself out there. I would go out by myself and I slowly started to meet people who understood me. I felt like I could be 100 percent myself without being judged. For the past two years or so, I also met a group of people through my boyfriend, and I couldn’t be happier.
This last year, I realized that although I struggled making friends, I shouldn’t compare myself to other people. I’m shy and I’m awkward so the process might not be as easy for me but pushing myself to look beyond my comfort zone is the first step.
Art by Lara Intong
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